It’s all about you!

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Life is unpredictable. You might be leading a charmed life at the moment but you never know when life starts throwing curveballs your way. And when that happens, how you respond back is what defines you. It is not the life, but it is YOU!

First and foremost, you must know the difference between RESPONSE and REACTION. Where ‘reaction’ on one hand, is the emotional trigger that automatically occurs once you face a situation, the ‘response’ is a much sorted out, thoughtful action which is totally in your control. Imagine a situation, where a high intensity earthquake hits an area and there is a lot of damage to houses, properties and lives of people. Do you think every single person affected by that calamity, is going to react in a same way? Definitely not! Even if you pick one family from that scene, do you feel every member of that one family is going to be affected the same way and to the same extent, keeping in mind they all shared the same amount of loss? Again, NO! So, it is always advisable to respond and not react! Your emotions should be under your control and not with the outside world. The situation shouldn’t trigger your action/reaction, YOU should!

Yes, there are highs and lows in everyone’s life. There are good memories and there are bad moments too. But that is the beauty of LIFE! How do you expect to enjoy the accomplishments, if you have never experienced how failures taste? How do you value happiness and contentment, if you have never went through sorrowful times? These ups and downs are what make our life valuable and worth living.

There can be unexpected blows, in your business, in your relationships and in any aspect of your life. But it is YOU who has to take charge of yourself, pull yourself together, stand up once again and be ready to face life one more time. You just cannot afford to sit and mourn over your loss for the rest of your life. Don’t let a single incident, or a situation or even a single person dictate how you are going to live. This is your life, your journey! Learn from everything and everyone that comes your way, no matter how good or bad. Keep garnering different experiences of your life and keep moving!

Life can be a roller coaster ride but so it is for everyone else on this planet too. So why complain? Why compare? Why blame it on destiny, why pity your circumstances? Don’t live a life passively, only to look behind before dying, and repenting on your attitude. Take responsibility of where you are, and then decide how you can reach where you want to be. Because, it’s not your life that is stopping you, it’s YOU!

 

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And here comes the new year…

I just got a forwarded message on WhatsApp saying

“Don’t be too excited about this new year stuff. Only the calendar has changed. The spouse, job and targets remain the same.”

Although it seems funny at once, but it has a deep meaning hidden beneath the humor. Every year, with the midnight stroke on New year eve, the whole world goes crazy with celebrations, fireworks, parties and so much more. Everyone makes new year resolutions and makes promises to themselves for changing their habits, and working harder on their dreams but all this enthusiasm and determination wears down by the end of first two weeks. So, in short, nothing changes except for the calendar year.

However, there is one more thing that we can change to actually beautify the coming year and all the years to follow,  and that is – ATTITUDE. Our attitude towards life and towards everything around us, is what determines the quality of our life. Shifting our focus from negativities around us to the little positive elements hidden inside them, can make a huge difference. A person with positive attitude views every problem as an opportunity, he has the power to turn every adversity to prosperity. Even if you cannot find any positivity in a situation, at least you can sit down and ask yourself if there is anything you can do to change the situation. If yes, then stop cribbing and starting doing. If no, then even if you cry over it endlessly, nothing is going to change. Sometimes, we just need to let go. And sometimes, we just need to give it time, because time heals almost everything.

Now, going back to the forwarded message, New year won’t change your job, or your spouse or your in-laws. But if this year, you change your attitude towards them and overall towards life, you might just witness a magical twist in your relationships, in your profession and in every aspect of your life. Just be a little kinder, a little compassionate, more tolerant and a little more positive and you will have a blessed and actually happy new year!

 

The two wolves!

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Let me begin with a short story which you might have already read or heard. A grandfather tells his grandson “We all have two wolves inside us battling with each other. One wolf is angry, jealous, full of hatred and corrupt. The other one is joyous, loving, caring, selfless and compassionate. ” The grandson asks, “So which wolf wins the battle?”. “The one you feed!”, replies the grandfather.

Isn’t it so true? We all have both the good and bad wolves inside us. There are times when even the kindest person would have got angry, and even a worst of worst man also can be loving and kind. There is good and bad in each one of us. Sometimes, we go out of our way to help someone in need and at other times, we are so rude and angry with our own family members. Now, the question is – if we have the angel and devil both inside us, which one of our behavior supersedes the other? The answer is pretty simple, the one we pay more attention to!

Our mind is constantly getting fed with information from outside world. Think of it like a black box – you feed some input and you get some output. Let us not focus on what processes inside the black box. But what is 100 percent true is that the output is directly proportional to input. In this media dominating world, no doubt, we are constantly being fed with all the negative news and information about the world. So, what can we expect from the quality of our thoughts, aren’t they bound to be negative and full of fear and anger? Now, if we invest our time in reading motivational books and articles or listening to such videos/podcasts, isn’t is going to impact our thoughts in a positive way. It sure will!

Both the wolves are hungry, both need to be fed. It is totally our choice whom we want to feed more and give life to. And that is truly going to shape our life in turn!

Which seed have you sown today?

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Seeds are the foundation of any plant. It is the type and quality of seed that determines what plant will grow from it. If you want to have a rose in your backyard, you won’t sow a cactus seed. What if you don’t know, what seed you are holding in your hand and you just throw it in the soil, and you do it again some other day, and keep doing it unconsciously for some time. One day, it may be in some weeks, or months or even years, you will see a little lawn of plants in front of you. And then you say to yourself, “this is not what I want”. But do you have a choice now?

Now replace the word ‘seed’ with ‘thought’ and replace ‘plant’ with ‘future’ and read the above paragraph again! Yes, I mean it.

Surprised? But isn’t it so true? Each day, each moment, we are writing our future, totally unaware and unconscious of it. Each thought we are creating, will one day, manifest itself into reality. This reality becomes our future. And once it does become future, do we have a choice to change it even if we are totally unhappy with it? Definitely No.

Of course, there is a time gap between when the seed was sown and when the actual plant budded out of it. Same is the case with our thoughts. But once we become aware of the power of our thoughts, we must start keeping a check on what we think, how we think. No wonder, we see people around us who talk negative most of the times, and then actually face a lot of unwanted circumstances. It is the result of all the seeds that they have sown all along the way.

Now, there is a very strong connection between the information we get and the thoughts we create. So, if your mind constantly creates worries, tensions and ‘what if’ kind of thoughts, you need to check what information are you  feeding to your mind, what kind of people you are surrounded with. Once the inflow is positive and pure, the outflow will automatically correct itself. And soon it will start reflecting in your actions and thus your destiny!

In conclusion, our thoughts truly shape our life. We become what we think. The quality of the seeds we are sowing today will determine what crop we will reap tomorrow. So choose your seeds wisely and remember : “Your mind is a garden. Your thoughts are the seeds. You can grow flowers OR you can grow weeds. ”

 

Well begun is half done!

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Every soul on this earth has dreams and ambitions that they are passionate about. Each one of us has some creativity, some talent inside us but due to some reason, we just don’t acknowledge it. Or even if we do, we are too lazy to work on it and polish it. Sometimes, we are just too scared to deviate from the ‘normal’ way of living, worrying ‘what others might think of us’, ‘what if we fail’.

I was sailing in the same boat a year back when I started blogging. I had given in to my corporate job, my family and my home. Even after realizing how much happiness I get in ‘writing’, I tended to overlook my passion. It was only during my maternity leave, I could actually squeeze out some time to start writing a little bit. Of course it was tough with the little one around. But I felt productive at the end of the day. I am still a new blogger but I am glad that I have at least started the race; race with nobody else but my own self, with who I was yesterday.

To begin is always the hardest step of any journey. But once you begin, you have won half the battle already. As famous motivational author Robin Sharma says, “Every change is hard at the beginning, messy in the middle and gorgeous in the end“. We must at least give ourselves a chance to start and not just quit before trying. As only with the commencement of any task, we will come to know how good we are at it.

Another important thing to remember while beginning anything, is the first thought you create. You must start anything with a positive spirit, with hope and with a passion to give your best. Don’t let the clouds of self doubt surround you, don’t let the dust of negativity settle on your thoughts. Just believe in yourself and start the new journey, not the one that the world wants from you, but the one your heart wants you to!

Remember, You can and you should and if you are brave enough to start, you will!

 

If you think you can, you can!

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I remember I was in 9th grade when I heard a fellow classmate deliver a speech in the morning assembly titled ‘If you think you can, you can!’ and it started with these words :

“When Sir Edmund Hilary was honored at one of the banquets for his courage to try climbing the world’s highest peak Mount Everest, even though he had failed at his attempts, he looked at the picture of Mount Everest displayed on the stage and said – “Mount Everest, you cannot grow any bigger but I CAN!” and we all know he actually grew bigger and conquered the giant peak with his will power!”.

Although at that tender age, I couldn’t understand much of that speech but somehow those lines stuck with me ever since. As I grew, and got into the habit of reading inspirational and motivational books and articles, I started understanding the real power of our thoughts. And I even experimented with it. Whenever, I believed in something from the bottom of my heart, and left no space for doubts and ‘ifs and buts’, I always achieved it. And so can be true for anyone on this earth. We just need to focus on what we truly desire, believe in our worth and capability, and just take the first step towards it and the success just follows!

The moment we replace our fear with courage and doubts with faith, the moment we start believing in ourselves, all the obstacles start melting and there is nothing that can stop us from achieving what we want. In fact, our thoughts are so powerful that if we actually knew the impact of our thoughts, we would never even dare to create any negative thought in our mind.

So, work on the level of your ‘thoughts’ if you really want to change your life. To change the fruits, you have to change the roots. Start believing that YOU CAN and you certainly will 🙂

 

 

 

Looking for a little positivity in your life? Try these simple tips!

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No matter how charming this word ‘positivity’ sounds, we still strive hard to make it a part of our thinking process. And anything that takes effort is mostly ignored or postponed by all of us. The roots of our attitude lie in our thoughts and thoughts cannot be changed overnight. So how to get there? Step by step probably! So here are 7 little tips that might help you boost your inner self and make your mind more calm and at peace.

If you feel overwhelmed by the tips or it seems like an uphill task, take and implement one tip at a time. Follow it for a week before picking up another tip and within few weeks, you will see a positive change in your life. So, lets get started:-

  • Wake up 10 minutes early each day : It might seem a bit clichéd, but trust me, rushing in the morning hours does impact your whole day because the very first thought you create after waking up is bound to be a negative one. Getting late for work/school, missing breakfasts, and forgetting things at home are just physical things. The damage at inner level is much more severe specially when done on daily basis.
    Tip: Initially, you can give yourself the liberty of waking up late on weekends/holidays but once you understand the benefits of waking up early, you will surely change your habit forever 🙂
  • Sound mind resides in a sound body : Health is the topmost thing that we ignore in our stressful and busy lives but it only increases our stress levels which further degrades our health. So it is a loop. And you have to break it. Either start looking after your health OR stop taking stress (I think the former is easier).
    Don’t worry if you have no time/money for gym. Just a 20 minutes walk daily, yoga or exercise at home thrice a week, playing outdoor with your kids or pets, anything that moves your body will work. Even better, while you talk on cell phones (I know you do it for so many hours each day), make it a habit to walk and talk 🙂
    Drinking a lot of water, eating fresh fruits and veggies, not skipping meals (specially breakfast), do I even need to tell you this?
  • Smile more often : It doesn’t cost you anything, it only makes you look even more beautiful 🙂 So never miss a chance to smile, even at strangers. You never know who you smile at, might be in dire need of a little positivity and your smile shows him a ray of hope.
  • Spend time in nature : There is nothing more rejuvenating for anyone than to walk in a green park, sit under a shady tree feeling the cool breeze (in summers) and soaking in sun (in winters), sitting on grass, looking at the hills, listening to the waves of the sea at beaches, there is no end to what options our bountiful nature has given us to relax our mind.
    Although doing this on daily basis will do wonders, but if you don’t have much time, at least once a week, treat yourself to the beauty of your surroundings.
  • Output is directly proportional to the input : Now, if your mind is constantly creating negative thoughts throughout your day, you need to check on what are you feeding to your mind. Watching/reading news (which are mostly negative these days) the first thing in the morning or the last of the day, will fill your subconscious mind with a negative image of the world and this will block your positive thoughts.
    Starting your day with a prayer/meditation or even sitting with family (without phones) on breakfast table will surely help to kick start a positive day. I know it is difficult to take out time for reading good books (which surely helps), instead you can start watching a 10 minutes positive video everyday before going to bed or whenever you are online.
    Tip: Subscribe to positive video channels on YouTube (like TED talks) or follow inspirational pages on Facebook so that you come across such uplifting content more often. 
  • Gratitude is important : Are you grateful for the breath that you just took? You better be, because every second, 2 persons die in this world. Are your limbs all functioning well? Are your loved ones alive? Do you have work to earn money? Do you have food on your plate and clothes on your body? Do you have shelter to sleep safely? If even one of the answers is YES, then you should be grateful. Trust me on this, the more you fill yourself with gratitude, the more you will get AND the more you complain, you will never have enough! Contentment doesn’t mean you stop working to achieve more, or don’t aim high. It just means, not to lose yourself in the path of achieving more.
  • We rise by lifting others : I had to save the most important one for the last! By being kind to others and by helping the needy ones, you not only open the gates of receiving blessings, but also your attitude towards life changes to a great extent. You will find more meaning in your existence, and without any extra effort, your life will be more positive than ever before! Remember, no one has ever become poor from GIVING.